Pondering an anniversary

2 Loves

2 Loves…how I miss those chubby chins.

My Facebook feed was blown up yesterday due to a 40th anniversary. I read an article from Eugene Cho: To whom it may concern: Imagine the possibilities. Imagine the life that could be lived out. because of it. I’ve read many articles about it, on it, the whys and why nots for and against it. And I have to be honest with you.

I’m a fence rider.

Not because I don’t believe in the sanctity of life. Not because I don’t believe women shouldn’t have a right to determine what happens to their bodies. Not because I don’t believe that God intended humanity to be filled with beauty and life. Not because I believe that church and state are mostly and should be separated.

Not because I am sinful…or maybe because I am.

But truthfully, where is the argument or at least the point, when at the end of the day both sides are hurting? Woman, baby, families, broken in two by the loss of love? The loss of compassion? The loss of grace?

I’ve been reading a book that my sister-in-law gave me for Christmas, Ann Voskamp’s One Thousand Gifts: A Dare to Live Fully Right Where You Are. It’s focus on grace, on thanksgiving…I think is a genius answer to the hatred and pain that is felt throughout this argument. It’s exploration of the basis of sin and evil in the world being rooted in our ungrateful hearts, in a lack of thanksgiving. Through these reflections on faith and practice she connects the pieces together a little bit more for me on my own beliefs. Grace. What is grace?

I’m not looking for a debate or a fight or really anything, mostly I’m just shifting through my thoughts. I realize this won’t make sense to some and maybe will to others. As a mother, as a daughter, as an adoptee who doesn’t know her birth parents, as a child of God, and more simply as a player in humanity…I don’t dare to profess I have all the answers. I long for the goodness, the gratefulness that we once had as perfectly created and perfectly seeing, and in that longing I attempt to make a life and a belief that emulates what could have been. What is if we humble ourselves to embrace grace.


Calling all Instagram users

I’m sure most of you have heard the buzz about Instagram’s new terms of service. I’ve been reading and looking to find some answers but I’m still on the fence as to what I will do with my account.

I confess, I am a bit addicted. I like being able to take pictures and make them “arty.” I’m delusional I find it to be a fun and entertaining way to keep in touch with some family and friends that are far away. I prefer it over Twitter indefinitely and indulge my voyeuristic side looking at other moms’ crafts, baking/cooking, and interior decorating. I mean, for pete’s sake, my avatar is an Instagram photo!

However I am NOT comfortable with all the creepers and weirdos, all the sickos and perverts and whoever that role play “adoption” games on Insta. These people steal photos of naive unsuspecting parents that don’t have private accounts and use them in “cyber orphanages” where a virtual baby broker sets up adoptions with role-playing parents. I’m sure some of these people are kids who don’t know better or whose parents don’t know what they’re doing, but nonetheless  it’s freaking creepy. Because of this kind of stuff, I made my account private. I’m absolutely fine with not having a million + followers. I like having the ability to pick and choose who does and does not have access to my photo updates. I like being able to do an “insta background check” on potential “followers.”

These new terms of service? I don’t know know. They’re so vague and so unexplained by Facebook/Instagram that I’m wary of their capabilities. I’ve been poking around, reading articles, the following are just a few that I’ve read through but none of them explicitly contains a thorough statement/explanation from the company/parent company’s stance.

  1. What Instagram’s new terms of service mean for you
  2. How your Instagram photo might end up in an ad
  3. Should you be concerned about Instagram’s new privacy policy?
  4. Instagram’s new terms of service
  5. Instagram says it now has the right to sell your photos
  6. Everyone’s freaking out over Instagram turning users’ photos into ads (even though most grams are already ads)

For that reason, I’ve decided to delete my account until further notice. If it all turns out to be a hoax, so be it. I’d rather be an over-protective, slightly-neurotic, den mother than see mine and my family’s privacy dissolve for the sake of greed and consumerism. Besides, I could always reopen an account later.

If you use Instagram, what are you going to do?

Update: After some dialouge on facebook this morning, I was sent this link: No, Instagram can’t see your photos: what the new terms of service really mean It does clear up some vague information but it still does not address how private account users’ photos will be treated with the new terms of service. Will IG still use my photos so that people I have not approved can access them?