Bills, Bills, Bills

I want to buy a house.

A cute little one, a few bedrooms, a bathroom or two, a yard with a few nice trees, maybe a porch and a fireplace. Nothing too fancy. Nothing too classic or rustic or modern or (God forbid) too Americana-ized.

A cute house in a nice town.

Moses and Ada could have a yard.
We could get a real-sized dog too.

Meh.

One day I suppose we will. I would like to if we’re not going to do over-seas missions…that would make sense…right?

Until then, we march forward with our renters’ status. Paying off bills, bills, and some more bills with a few loans for good measure. I know that we’re not the only young family saddled with a stretch-it-if-you-can financial situation, it seems almost a sort of right of passage. Some ritual that all young couples and families must go through in order to really appreciate what their parents before them had to experience. It’s a “mark of adulthood,” I suppose, when one really has to start sticking to their budget instead of buying that extra cute pair of shoes at Macy’s or those cool new snowboard bindings. And I suppose it’s an even bigger “mark of adulthood” when you start forgoing fun day trips in order to stay home so your kid’s schedule won’t get thrown off by all the driving. Who knew?

Lots of people tell you these things when you’re in high school and you’re still sassy and independent (in your mind anyway). Lots of people tell you these things when you’re single. Then when you’re engaged followed after by marriage. Lots of people tell you these things when you’re a couple. Then you get pregnant and lots of people share even more than the first time your life changed. Shortly after which is followed by a baby and then lots of people really tell you things…more things than you ever asked for (more often than not, you never asked in the first place).

But did they really know before they did it? We certainly didn’t, most certainly don’t. But like everyone else, we persevere.

The bills won’t last forever (well…at least not if I win the lottery) and the loans will eventually be paid off. We’ll eventually have higher than entry-level jobs. We’ll eventually be grounded, steady and grown up with a house. Eventually.

Until then, we focus on and live in the now with excited anticipation for the future. Can we do both? I think so. I’m trying to anyway. Being content with where I am has always been an issue I’ve struggled with. I’ve always been so excited to jump towards the future, to see what’s next, and in doing so I’ve missed out on too much. And now with the addition of Ada into our lives, I certainly do not want to miss a minute (although, depending on the sleepless-night-after or missed nap or stamping-foot-i-hate-you-moment I’m in…I might disagree…for a second).

So maybe instead of always stressing the financial part of adulthood…maybe we should stress the contentment part. Not the lazy, unambitious kind of contentment…but rather the kind of contentment that lives in the moment with their dreams close at hand. Maybe with that kind of advice we’d be less anxious, less stressed, less disappointed when things don’t go according to our five-year-plans. Maybe we’d persevere easier knowing that we didn’t have to have it all and then not just have it all, but also that we didn’t have to have it all right now. Maybe we’d take more time to relax and refresh and not feel guilty. Who knows.

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