I can’t believe it.
Has it really been a year already?
I’m sure that most, if not all parents feel the same way about their first child. I know it’s not a specific feeling to what we’re experiencing this Valentines’ Day. I know it’s cliche. But it certainly doesn’t make it any less true.
It’s funny to think that not so long ago I was always wishing for time to move quicker. To be old enough to be in junior high to be old enough to be in senior high to be old enough to drive a car, to graduate, to go to college, to get married, to have a baby…I certainly wouldn’t go so far as to say that I wasted that time, but now in retrospect, I shouldn’t have been so eager to fly past time.
I’m working on being content in all situations. It’s definitely been a struggle, it is a struggle, but I’d like to think that God and I are really working on it. Just as we were comfortable in Grand Forks, we need to become comfortable here in Idyllwild. Who knows how long God is going to have us here, it could be our “Promised Land” or it could be our Haran. Who knows. I just know that we need to enjoy and revel in the time allowed us here, even when things aren’t perfect. Because really, when are they ever perfect?
I thank God everyday for my beautiful baby girl. She has been the most amazing lesson in contentment. I realize
now that I should savor every moment allotted me with Ada. To be content with what stage she’s at and who she is before that one is gone. Don’t get me wrong, I’m more than excited to learn about her as she ages, to get to know her personality over the years, to celebrate in her accomplishments and to comfort in her trials. But I know that I will never again have my baby as she is right now.
And that blows my mind.
Because honestly, I could sit and watch her sleep in my arms for forever. I could sing her silly songs forever and watch her face glow with delight. I would love to snuggle with her before putting her to bed forever. I would relish getting sloppy baby kisses forever. There are so many things that I wish could be forever but simply cannot be. And that’s okay. My baby has taught me that being content with now and loving tomorrow and what it will bring is also okay. That it’s not a paradox that I cannot comprehend.
We have been so blessed.
We are so lucky.